Movie: P.S. I Love You
Like/Don't Like: Like
Dear Hillary Swank,
I'm writing you to let you know that I can't watch anymore of your movies. I don't want you to take offense to this but I'm pretty sure it's you. I know that I'm a natural crier, that crying for me is sort of like breathing in that it's an involuntary reflex. I can't help myself. But I started crying right at the beginning of this movie and didn't stop until the credits rolled. Which brought to mind, naturally, your other movie that made me weep bitter tears, Million Dollar Baby. I actually can't think of other movies that you've been in that I've seen but now I think it's best if I stay far, far away from them. I don't recall crying very much during your brief stint on Beverly Hills 90210 but I would not be surprised.
Aside from all the tears, I really liked this movie. It wasn't as schmaltzy as I expected it to be and it had the Ultimate Triumvirate of Hot Men: Gerard Butler, Harry Connick Jr., and That Guy Katherine Heigl was In Love With but Who Died in the One and Only Episode of Grey's Anatomy that I've Seen. And Hillary, I have to admit that I've always been a little terrified of your enormous teeth, but they weren't nearly as distracting as I feared they would be. You were actually really lovely in this part. That should make up for me dumping your, right?
But it's not enugh to sway me. My new New Year's resolution will be no more Hillary Swank movies. I think I really embarrassed that girl next to me with all of my pathetic sniffling.