Saturday, May 29, 2010

Just Wright

Movie:  Just Wright
Like/Don't Like:  Just Wrong

You know how people who go through traumatic events together share a special lifelong bond?  War buddies and survivors of plane crashes - those types.  So no matter how far apart they are or how many years separate them from the event they still can call each other up and say, "Hey, remember that time we were marooned on an island?"

Well, I had my Band of Brothers experience tonight with 8 other girls watching this movie.  We all went out to celebrate Camille's birthday and had a grand time at dinner before hand.  We were giggly and full and relieved we weren't in line for Sex and the City II, where there appeared to be a skanky dress and laughably inappropriate-for-a-movie-theater high heel shoes dress code going on.  And it's a Queen Latifah movie, and well, I think she's great.  I mean, she doesn't really have a wide range or anything but she plays sassy really well, and we all know how much I love the sass. 

It all seemed so promising.

And then Common came on.  He played the man who's suppose to fall in love with her - and that would have been fine and believable except that a.) they had sub-zero chemistry and b.) he has sub-zero acting skills.  I know that Common is a rapper but I've never heard any of his music.  But based strictly on his acting abilities, he had better stick with his day job.  Knights of Columbus, he was BAD!  Painfully bad.  Awkwardly bad.  There were moments when I had to avert my eyes because I was so embarrassed that he was so bad.  And it was slow.  And long.  And Paula Patton had freaky teeth, like her dentist just laid a set of veneers over her original teeth, thus making them too big for her mouth.  It was distracting.  But also a relief because then I could focus on them instead of how crappy the movie was.

At the end of it we all gathered in the lobby and stood in stunned silence over what we had experienced - knowing that this would be the day that forged our friendship forever.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Sherlock Holmes

Movie:  Sherlock Holmes
Like/Don't Like:  A solid Like.

By sheer coincidence I read a few of the Sherlock Holmes stories just before this movie came out.  I'm very glad I didn't see it in the theater because I think I would have been a little annoyed with the liberties that were taken.  But as I have no memory for things I read I only had a vague discomfort about it and then got over the whole thing and enjoyed the movie. 

The story sort of gave me the creeps (secret society practicing the dark arts), and also, was a little dull, and I have a hard time watching fighting sequences with all those realistic sound effects.  I can close my eyes through the rough parts but I can still hear the bones snapping.  Eek.  But Sherlock Holmes is one of the best literary characters of all times and Robert Downey Jr. played him expertly.  Well, for a pumped up action hero - which is a bit ridiculous - he played him expertly.  I also think he would have done a great job with the traditional more cerebral/less punchy Holmes with the deerstalker cap.  He got the essence of him - making him the smartest guy in the room and knowing it.  Jude Law was surprisingly good as well.  I say surprisingly because I'm always surprised when I like him in something.  The mustache helped - as it always does.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Gentlemen Broncos

Movie:  Gentlemen Broncos
Like/Don't Like:  Um.  Well.  Okay, yes, I'm on board with this.

As a general rule I'm not much for movies with excessive vomiting or other gross-out humor.  I'm a sensitive soul.  And I usually max out with a Jared Hess movie about an hour into them. 

But there were several times during this movie when I laughed loud and hard.  So yes, I liked it.  I liked it mostly because of Jemaine from Flight of the Conchords, who played a sci-fi writer.  And Sam Rockwell, who plays essentially the same character he played in Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy - which is not a bad thing.

The story is sparse, and also irrelevant because the whole point of these types of movies is to have a succession of random scenes that show off funny characters and non-sequiturs.  If you know this going in you'll love it.  Especially the scene where we learn how to make up sci-fi names.  It is hilarious and also dead-on.